by Madi

Only in the most crushing hours

when memory is perched on my ribcage

will I begin to pick and gnaw at the edges

of my becoming.

Perpetual blooming, I am a hundred petals,

each grown over their mother’s likeness;

I am generational.

I am the fingertips of all who have laid their thoughts on me,

and every dream my mother has laid to rest.

I am the bearer of every life I couldn’t stay in.

Attempts to scour away my dead selves

burn in futility amidst this aching knowledge:

despite my desired impermanence, I live on

in the living experiences of those whose names

are no longer welcome on my tongue.



Madi von Benecke is a psychology graduate at Monash University Malaysia. Growing up, she has had to make a temporary home of several different countries; a lifestyle that has manifested itself into a writing style that is both worldly and distant. Her writing often explores themes of time, the shadow self, and self-acceptance. She has had no previous publications of her work.

Instagram: @cosmichydrangea