Only in the most crushing hours
when memory is perched on my ribcage
will I begin to pick and gnaw at the edges
of my becoming.
Perpetual blooming, I am a hundred petals,
each grown over their mother’s likeness;
I am generational.
I am the fingertips of all who have laid their thoughts on me,
and every dream my mother has laid to rest.
I am the bearer of every life I couldn’t stay in.
Attempts to scour away my dead selves
burn in futility amidst this aching knowledge:
despite my desired impermanence, I live on
in the living experiences of those whose names
are no longer welcome on my tongue.
Madi von Benecke is a psychology graduate at Monash University Malaysia. Growing up, she has had to make a temporary home of several different countries; a lifestyle that has manifested itself into a writing style that is both worldly and distant. Her writing often explores themes of time, the shadow self, and self-acceptance. She has had no previous publications of her work.